List 10 things you would tell your 16 year-old self, if you could.
1. that your hair is only one little part of the uniqueness of you...embrace ALL the things that make you special
2. the girl you THINK is your best friend forever...really isn't
3. drinking and driving IS really bad and REALLY irresponsible
4. the boy you think you'll marry...he's just one boy in a long line, stop wasting your time and get the heck out of alaska!!!
5. the music you are listening to RIGHT NOW (remember this is 16 year old Esther) is THE best music. period. nothing will come close.
6. the preppy handbook isn't a bible
7. eat more...this is a dangerous pattern and you are perfect as you ARE
8. there is someone out there who thinks you are beautiful...he's going to tell you and you will believe him
9. molly ringwald is a bad actress
10. the year 2000 will be great...don't be scared!
xxoo
momma
Tuesday, June 11, 2013
Monday, June 10, 2013
me + him
Describe your relationship with your spouse.
what can i tell you three about us...
i know that sometimes when we argue, it upsets you, and that makes me sad
but
let me fill you in on why those arguments sometimes mean something more
when daddy and i met, we both had reasons to be guarded and cautious before entering into a new relationship, really we did
and yet
even from that very first meeting we both knew that we had met someone who was
more
than any of the other someones we had in our pasts
for us, we can't explain
what or how
why or when
but we both fell in love fast and forever
nothing
was going to keep us apart.
that was 1992 and really nothing has kept us apart
we are as crazy now
as we were back then
just a little greyer, and maybe a little more wrinkled,
but in spite of everything we've been through
we are together
when you love someone as much as we love each other, sometimes life gets
loud
it doesn't mean that you aren't compatible
it might mean a lot of things that you as a couple haven't even figured out
yet
but it does mean that you keep working
as a team
to be strong individuals
people who complete each other.
that's our relationship...we complete each other.
it's our true love wish for each of you to find the same
don't settle
fight for it
and work hard every day.
we love you
momma and daddy
what can i tell you three about us...
i know that sometimes when we argue, it upsets you, and that makes me sad
but
let me fill you in on why those arguments sometimes mean something more
when daddy and i met, we both had reasons to be guarded and cautious before entering into a new relationship, really we did
and yet
even from that very first meeting we both knew that we had met someone who was
more
than any of the other someones we had in our pasts
for us, we can't explain
what or how
why or when
but we both fell in love fast and forever
nothing
was going to keep us apart.
that was 1992 and really nothing has kept us apart
we are as crazy now
as we were back then
just a little greyer, and maybe a little more wrinkled,
but in spite of everything we've been through
we are together
when you love someone as much as we love each other, sometimes life gets
loud
it doesn't mean that you aren't compatible
it might mean a lot of things that you as a couple haven't even figured out
yet
but it does mean that you keep working
as a team
to be strong individuals
people who complete each other.
that's our relationship...we complete each other.
it's our true love wish for each of you to find the same
don't settle
fight for it
and work hard every day.
we love you
momma and daddy
Sunday, June 09, 2013
Number 2
Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears
1. swimming: Gaia and Grandpadad put us in swimming lessons when we were all very small. I started swimming on a team in Anchorage when I was 6, and swam all through high school and into college. My freshman year I went out for the swim team for my college. That year was a monumentally difficult year, for a number of reasons, including that I was in the wrong place at the wrong school for me...I remember coming back to practice after a long weekend and diving into the pool. Instead of feeling relaxed and free in the water, I felt like someone was pulling me down to the bottom. I got out of the pool and quit the team. Now, the only time I feel safe swimming, is if I'm swimming back stroke...
2. the dentist. THAT is all because of the dental psycho that Gaia took us to when I was little. He didn't thnk that children could feel pain and so all the procedures he did, were without ANY pain relief. He was a freak and I hated him.
3. the immediacy of getting on an airplane. I HATE waiting for the doors to close. Since September 11, 2001, I've stopped enjoying flying. I think it's because I realized that the world really is full of some horribly bad people.
this wasn't a fun post :o( but I did it.
i love you,
momma
1. swimming: Gaia and Grandpadad put us in swimming lessons when we were all very small. I started swimming on a team in Anchorage when I was 6, and swam all through high school and into college. My freshman year I went out for the swim team for my college. That year was a monumentally difficult year, for a number of reasons, including that I was in the wrong place at the wrong school for me...I remember coming back to practice after a long weekend and diving into the pool. Instead of feeling relaxed and free in the water, I felt like someone was pulling me down to the bottom. I got out of the pool and quit the team. Now, the only time I feel safe swimming, is if I'm swimming back stroke...
2. the dentist. THAT is all because of the dental psycho that Gaia took us to when I was little. He didn't thnk that children could feel pain and so all the procedures he did, were without ANY pain relief. He was a freak and I hated him.
3. the immediacy of getting on an airplane. I HATE waiting for the doors to close. Since September 11, 2001, I've stopped enjoying flying. I think it's because I realized that the world really is full of some horribly bad people.
this wasn't a fun post :o( but I did it.
i love you,
momma
Saturday, June 08, 2013
The List
THE LIST:
List 20 random things about yourself:
1. my initials go in alphabetical order and I LOVE it! (EFGH)
2. Daddy has always been suspicious that I maried him for the 'H'
3. when I was 13 I saw a romany gypsy fortune teller in Crail (scotland) who told me that I would marry man who had an 'H' initial
4. that same gypsy told me i would only marry once, for true love, and that we would have 3 children and our first born would have a 'P' initial
5. Daddy and i really do argue too much, but we have always loved each other-i'm sorry if we've scared you
6. the summer job i HATED was working for Alaska Airlines in the food/catering department...GrandpaDad thought it would be a nice job b/c i loved cooking so much...it STUNK and I was out of there before the week was over
7. if you ever find yourself in an impossible situation, you need to tell SOMEONE, remember you have your family to support you
8. you will have friends come and go in your lifetime...some friends come around again and again...remember to treat people the way you want to be treated-even if they don't
9. NEVER DRINK AND DRIVE...I MEAN IT!
10. i wish i had a superhero power besides sonic hearing...invisibility would be awesome
11. i hope that i can be closer with your uncles as we get older
12. education is important-school was sometimes hard for me too-you just have to get through
13. yes...college matters
14. i loved and hated being in a sorority...since graduating, the special few sisters with whom i've maintained relationships, have continued to make me a better person
15. i tell you that i'm over having pets, and secretly when i'm alone in the house, i do love Junior and even Oreo
16. being a grown up is rewarding and frustrating...a weird combination of up and down, like redbull and vodka...consume your adulthood with thought and care!
17. sometimes there are no answers...no, you weren't born with instruction manuals, Daddy and i have had to figure each of you out without instructions-sometimes we get it right, sometimes we totally screw it up, but we've always loved you-never doubt that
18. date a lot...marriage is real, and tricky...falling in love is the easy and fun part...staying in love will be the work of your life! Choose WISELY!
19.i hate eating fish...i know it's good for us...but yuck. all i ever really want to eat is junk food
20. the dentist really scares me and thinking about going gives me panic attacks...dentists i'm sure really are good people but personally, i think they are messengers from H**L!
30 things I want the kinder to know about me...
http://www.babymakingmachine.com/2012/11/30-things-my-kids-should-know-about-me.html
good old pinterest.
I saw this and was immediately drawn to it-
maybe it's because the reality of mom passing on is beginning to sink in,
or
the sense that perhaps she left with stories unheard,
details of a very colorful life that she was waiting to share and didn't get that one last chance...
maybe i just
miss
her
either way, for Biggers, Wee, and our Cherry on Top
I want them to
know
and when the moment comes and i'm not here to
provide the answers
bake the happy cake
or simply show up with a surprise, just because...
they will be able to smile for their
knowin.
30 things about me that you should know...begins today
this is for you.
all my love, forever and ever
momma
good old pinterest.
I saw this and was immediately drawn to it-
maybe it's because the reality of mom passing on is beginning to sink in,
or
the sense that perhaps she left with stories unheard,
details of a very colorful life that she was waiting to share and didn't get that one last chance...
maybe i just
miss
her
either way, for Biggers, Wee, and our Cherry on Top
I want them to
know
and when the moment comes and i'm not here to
provide the answers
bake the happy cake
or simply show up with a surprise, just because...
they will be able to smile for their
knowin.
30 things about me that you should know...begins today
this is for you.
all my love, forever and ever
momma
Thursday, May 30, 2013
this is the dawning of the age of aquarius
the song that would instantly bridge the gap between me and mom
gaia
8 days after my last post, she passed away.
i still can't really believe that she isn't here with us anymore, because it doesn't feel like she has gone anywhere...i'm waiting for her to come waltzing back into the room as if she were Auntie Mame
for our children she was Auntie Mame and like her, she just slipped into another journey, where the adventure is hers first
completely impossible to replace any void she has left in our hearts
redefining our family takes a whole new meaning and like her
we go on
sleep sweet mommy
gleefie
gaia
8 days after my last post, she passed away.
i still can't really believe that she isn't here with us anymore, because it doesn't feel like she has gone anywhere...i'm waiting for her to come waltzing back into the room as if she were Auntie Mame
for our children she was Auntie Mame and like her, she just slipped into another journey, where the adventure is hers first
completely impossible to replace any void she has left in our hearts
redefining our family takes a whole new meaning and like her
we go on
sleep sweet mommy
gleefie
Wednesday, May 01, 2013
miracle
just when i thought our family could bear witness to no more sadness and hurt
my father has
"woken up"
from a 15 year rip van winkle of
half here
half there
somewhere
aways from us
yet
with us
he's found his way back
and is sitting in a hospital bed
talking to his firstborn grandchild
heart of my heart
with HIS
grandpadad
as if the last 15 years hadn't happened
sorry to have missed time
but thankful for
another
beautiful
chance
praise be to G-d.
thanks be to G-d...
heart of YOUR heart daddy
i love you
welcome home
dassie
my father has
"woken up"
from a 15 year rip van winkle of
half here
half there
somewhere
aways from us
yet
with us
he's found his way back
and is sitting in a hospital bed
talking to his firstborn grandchild
heart of my heart
with HIS
grandpadad
as if the last 15 years hadn't happened
sorry to have missed time
but thankful for
another
beautiful
chance
praise be to G-d.
thanks be to G-d...
heart of YOUR heart daddy
i love you
welcome home
dassie
Sunday, March 10, 2013
seven
it has been said that one is the lonliest number
but for you
i know
that this week
seven is that number
what i would do to take that empty space and
fill it...
so, like every day, and every year i will continue
to carry your hearts.
i love you e and gab
always.
but for you
i know
that this week
seven is that number
what i would do to take that empty space and
fill it...
so, like every day, and every year i will continue
to carry your hearts.
i love you e and gab
always.
Sunday, January 20, 2013
spin it
the costliest drivers license will provide
time with Biggers
a college visit with Wee
family in 2 states
and a much needed
BRAIN BREAK
counting down to spring!
umarmen und lieben
e
time with Biggers
a college visit with Wee
family in 2 states
and a much needed
BRAIN BREAK
counting down to spring!
umarmen und lieben
e
Saturday, January 19, 2013
drivers license renewal
coming up this spring...
new age-eek!
new weight-ugh!
new license...in person because my home state of record won't let me renew online.
thank you very very much for the costly-est license EVER.
#can'twin4losing
new age-eek!
new weight-ugh!
new license...in person because my home state of record won't let me renew online.
thank you very very much for the costly-est license EVER.
#can'twin4losing
Sunday, January 06, 2013
update version 2.13
welcome 2013!
we had a wonderful short weekend in Hberg with friends and our kiddos to properly ring in the new year
and
say goodbye to the city that held the heart of our little family
longer
than any other...
the Berg closes it's doors to our troops and surrounding services this summer
making this holiday season bittersweet, semi sweet-
and, in the end-just plain sweet
biggers was home for 2 complete weeks
he flew back this morning
making this final sunday of our break bittersweet, semi sweet-
and, as we all quietly walked to the car-just plain sweet
i've spent more time using this blog as a venting place
than as a
happy place
which is how i intended it to be
shiny happy life in casa h
when we opened our doors to live in nc SEVEN years ago
in the last few years there has just been so much upset
and frantic overreaction
hurt, worry, anger, frustration, fear-
i simply can't begin another year that way.
so it goes...
so i go...
back to the beginning.
maybe a new blog title
or a new banner...something that shows us now, not so much of then...
the kiddos came together and got me a new camera this holiday
i was able to save photos that i had forgotten even taking
which means that at some point they will be posted!
the phoenix from the ashes...2013
any suggestions for blog names or banner snaps will be taken into consideration, always with:
umarmen und lieben
we had a wonderful short weekend in Hberg with friends and our kiddos to properly ring in the new year
and
say goodbye to the city that held the heart of our little family
longer
than any other...
the Berg closes it's doors to our troops and surrounding services this summer
making this holiday season bittersweet, semi sweet-
and, in the end-just plain sweet
biggers was home for 2 complete weeks
he flew back this morning
making this final sunday of our break bittersweet, semi sweet-
and, as we all quietly walked to the car-just plain sweet
i've spent more time using this blog as a venting place
than as a
happy place
which is how i intended it to be
shiny happy life in casa h
when we opened our doors to live in nc SEVEN years ago
in the last few years there has just been so much upset
and frantic overreaction
hurt, worry, anger, frustration, fear-
i simply can't begin another year that way.
so it goes...
so i go...
back to the beginning.
maybe a new blog title
or a new banner...something that shows us now, not so much of then...
the kiddos came together and got me a new camera this holiday
i was able to save photos that i had forgotten even taking
which means that at some point they will be posted!
the phoenix from the ashes...2013
any suggestions for blog names or banner snaps will be taken into consideration, always with:
umarmen und lieben
Wednesday, December 05, 2012
complaint department
done.
angry
pissed
exhausted
tired of working day in day out, everywhere i turn,
to hear
"you might tell the wrong information"
or
"I DEMAND blah blah blah"
or
"you are a psycho" (as if i wasn't feeling crappy enough???)
never a "thank you"
or a
"what do you need?"
or anything else that might help me take the edge off
nothing.
every time i turn around
someone else telling me how pissed THEY are
and that i need to "fix it"
OR
fix myself.
i swear
some days are
SO
bad
that they just string themselves into the biggest flipping bundle of
tangled christmas lights
that all is left is
throwing away the lights
or
throwing in the towel.
being me is a ridiculously thankless and tedious chore...
angry
pissed
exhausted
tired of working day in day out, everywhere i turn,
to hear
"you might tell the wrong information"
or
"I DEMAND blah blah blah"
or
"you are a psycho" (as if i wasn't feeling crappy enough???)
never a "thank you"
or a
"what do you need?"
or anything else that might help me take the edge off
nothing.
every time i turn around
someone else telling me how pissed THEY are
and that i need to "fix it"
OR
fix myself.
i swear
some days are
SO
bad
that they just string themselves into the biggest flipping bundle of
tangled christmas lights
that all is left is
throwing away the lights
or
throwing in the towel.
being me is a ridiculously thankless and tedious chore...
Monday, October 08, 2012
Missing Fairfax County teen Bryan Glenn found dead - DC Breaking Local News Weather Sports FOX 5 WTTG
Missing Fairfax County teen Bryan Glenn found dead - DC Breaking Local News Weather Sports FOX 5 WTTG
no one will understand why i'm posting this
here
but for the record
for the moments our children and our family
shared with bryan
for the record
by posting the end of his beautiful life
we will always have opportunity to bear
witness
and never forget
our children are , as i've thought before, on loan...
G-d gives us the most precious gift
life
and in the midst of inexplicable horror and grief
i have to believe that G-d in taking bryan back
brought him home
one final time
you were and will be remembered as a beautiful, loving, funny, charming, delightful, smart, and wonderful child bryan-
here with us now and forever in our hearts
no one will understand why i'm posting this
here
but for the record
for the moments our children and our family
shared with bryan
for the record
by posting the end of his beautiful life
we will always have opportunity to bear
witness
and never forget
our children are , as i've thought before, on loan...
G-d gives us the most precious gift
life
and in the midst of inexplicable horror and grief
i have to believe that G-d in taking bryan back
brought him home
one final time
you were and will be remembered as a beautiful, loving, funny, charming, delightful, smart, and wonderful child bryan-
here with us now and forever in our hearts
Friday, October 05, 2012
nineteen
i already told him that the last time i didn't spend my entire day thinking about the greatness of my boy was in 1992...
october 5, 1993
my entire world changed
undoubtedly for the better
and every year i'll tell him
how he made me
into
me
and every year i'll tell him
how he made the world a better place
by being
him
every year
for
ever.
happy birthday biggers
you are my joy
(even when i find out that you
sneaky you
have another
tattoo!)
busted on your birthday!
i love you always-
to infinity and beyond
all around the island of sodor
always!
momma
october 5, 1993
my entire world changed
undoubtedly for the better
and every year i'll tell him
how he made me
into
me
and every year i'll tell him
how he made the world a better place
by being
him
every year
for
ever.
happy birthday biggers
you are my joy
(even when i find out that you
sneaky you
have another
tattoo!)
busted on your birthday!
i love you always-
to infinity and beyond
all around the island of sodor
always!
momma
Sunday, September 23, 2012
ridiculously fed up
would it be considered bad parenting to wave a white flag and say
"Screw it."
you've won...
you think you know
everything
there is to know in the world
and
that the people you choose
really are
the best choice for you and
your future?
would it be considered bad parenting to wave a white flag and say
"Screw it."
you've won...
you are ready to take on the world
and you don't need
a
momma in your corner
anymore
you're grown
go for it
live your life and
i'll see you when i see you.
what in the world is going on right now?!!
i'm exhausted
furious
sad
completely let down
and wondering if it was all a big facade
as i've been so pointedly informed by you two
our family wasn't a family after all.
what the heck.
"Screw it."
you've won...
you think you know
everything
there is to know in the world
and
that the people you choose
really are
the best choice for you and
your future?
would it be considered bad parenting to wave a white flag and say
"Screw it."
you've won...
you are ready to take on the world
and you don't need
a
momma in your corner
anymore
you're grown
go for it
live your life and
i'll see you when i see you.
what in the world is going on right now?!!
i'm exhausted
furious
sad
completely let down
and wondering if it was all a big facade
as i've been so pointedly informed by you two
our family wasn't a family after all.
what the heck.
Friday, August 31, 2012
achy breaky heart
and now that is stuck in your head too!
just remember that you had fair warning before you started reading...
the boy
biggers
a month gone by
and suddenly he is on the west coast
really
the point where his
vision quest
started and now stops
when did this all happen
where was i when he was growing
up?
and the girl, wee...
sixteen came on like a raging bull
a speeding bullet train
faster than a hummingbird's wing
16
littlest
well littlest hasn't done anything except grow 6 total inches
this summer
that and sleep
his good humor bridging all the moments that aren't so lovely
when you are heaped into massive
change
*sigh*
exhausting this parenting thing is
and
terribly achy breaky
i'm almost so spent from missing days in the life
that i don't have the energy to cry
and what i need is
a really
great
cry
umarmen und lieben
essie
just remember that you had fair warning before you started reading...
the boy
biggers
a month gone by
and suddenly he is on the west coast
really
the point where his
vision quest
started and now stops
when did this all happen
where was i when he was growing
up?
and the girl, wee...
sixteen came on like a raging bull
a speeding bullet train
faster than a hummingbird's wing
16
littlest
well littlest hasn't done anything except grow 6 total inches
this summer
that and sleep
his good humor bridging all the moments that aren't so lovely
when you are heaped into massive
change
*sigh*
exhausting this parenting thing is
and
terribly achy breaky
i'm almost so spent from missing days in the life
that i don't have the energy to cry
and what i need is
a really
great
cry
umarmen und lieben
essie
Friday, June 08, 2012
they call it pomp and circumstance for a reason
done.
beaming from ear to ear
Biggers took
the 30 steps
with
the 30 words
across a stage in a city 6000 miles away from the woods
right into his future!
i can't say that i have a single recollection of the words he chose to walk with
as he started moving my heart and my head focused on every step
footprints into my mind that i will
never forget
and with all the ceremony
the room was silent as i watched
and cried
and held my breath
and squeezed Team Leader's hand as
hard as he was squeezing mine
30 steps...easy
30 words...breezy
30 seconds...done
the world IS wide
and you have it in the palm of your hand
son
heart of mine
i hope you know how proud of you i am
and what a huge accomplishment this is-
like i said this week:
go now and make every new moment matter
just as much
as the ones you will carry in you heart
forever.
CONGRATULATIONS!!!!
i love you
momma
beaming from ear to ear
Biggers took
the 30 steps
with
the 30 words
across a stage in a city 6000 miles away from the woods
right into his future!
i can't say that i have a single recollection of the words he chose to walk with
as he started moving my heart and my head focused on every step
footprints into my mind that i will
never forget
and with all the ceremony
the room was silent as i watched
and cried
and held my breath
and squeezed Team Leader's hand as
hard as he was squeezing mine
30 steps...easy
30 words...breezy
30 seconds...done
the world IS wide
and you have it in the palm of your hand
son
heart of mine
i hope you know how proud of you i am
and what a huge accomplishment this is-
like i said this week:
go now and make every new moment matter
just as much
as the ones you will carry in you heart
forever.
CONGRATULATIONS!!!!
i love you
momma
Sunday, June 03, 2012
one step at a time
in 4 hours the transition begins
baccalaureate-downtown-in the oldest church of this beautiful city
the beginning of
pomp and circumstance
and my heart-all his friends here-they take the next few days to
make every day from the beginning to now
matter.
Congratulations Biggers
Hugs to you and the Class of 2012!!!
unarmen und lieben
Momma
baccalaureate-downtown-in the oldest church of this beautiful city
the beginning of
pomp and circumstance
and my heart-all his friends here-they take the next few days to
make every day from the beginning to now
matter.
Congratulations Biggers
Hugs to you and the Class of 2012!!!
unarmen und lieben
Momma
Monday, May 28, 2012
20 memorial days
twenty with team leader...
20 times to thank G-d for his mercy
and my husband's life
20 times to thank G-d for his grace
and my husband's friends
20 times to thank G-d for his intervention
and my husband's trips back home
to me
to us
20 times a day, not just one day a year,
but
every day of our life
to thank G-d
for him.
tonight, as i have every year,
i thank G-d
and every soldier who says
yes
when someone else can't
umarmen und lieben
essie
20 times to thank G-d for his mercy
and my husband's life
20 times to thank G-d for his grace
and my husband's friends
20 times to thank G-d for his intervention
and my husband's trips back home
to me
to us
20 times a day, not just one day a year,
but
every day of our life
to thank G-d
for him.
tonight, as i have every year,
i thank G-d
and every soldier who says
yes
when someone else can't
umarmen und lieben
essie
Saturday, May 26, 2012
countdown begins
and we're here.
staring at the blank face of the end of high school (that's me)
staring at the blank canvas of the beginning of life school (that's him)
deer in the headlights...perhaps.
this past week the european soccer championships were hardcore underway
SO many unbelievable lessons learned
heartache
disappointment
and unremarkable joy as we watched our children display true athleticism and humanity, sportsmanship and
humility
too many photos to post
but some of the favorites...right here on my blogger and
always in my heart
umarmen und lieben
essie
staring at the blank face of the end of high school (that's me)
staring at the blank canvas of the beginning of life school (that's him)
deer in the headlights...perhaps.
this past week the european soccer championships were hardcore underway
SO many unbelievable lessons learned
heartache
disappointment
and unremarkable joy as we watched our children display true athleticism and humanity, sportsmanship and
humility
too many photos to post
but some of the favorites...right here on my blogger and
always in my heart
umarmen und lieben
Friday, May 11, 2012
taking a selfish moment
in the quiet house
to let my heart break just a little
today
so that maybe
just maybe in a few weeks time...
when i watch him
walk across the stage and
into
the next wonderful chapter of the life
that
made me
HIS
mother...
i won't make an utter
spectacle of myself.
i'm planning his graduation party
and i still can't figure out
where
all these days of our lives
have gone.
heart of my heart, aching a little bit today, trying to avoid the
snap.
PAH
"love you forever-
like you for always-
as long as i'm living
my baby, you'll be"
xoxoxoxoxox
momma
to let my heart break just a little
today
so that maybe
just maybe in a few weeks time...
when i watch him
walk across the stage and
into
the next wonderful chapter of the life
that
made me
HIS
mother...
i won't make an utter
spectacle of myself.
i'm planning his graduation party
and i still can't figure out
where
all these days of our lives
have gone.
heart of my heart, aching a little bit today, trying to avoid the
snap.
PAH
"love you forever-
like you for always-
as long as i'm living
my baby, you'll be"
xoxoxoxoxox
momma
Sunday, April 29, 2012
HHS Senior Junior Prom 2012
like a sparkle of sun peeking through a cloud
like the lingering moments of a rainbow
suddenly the year is frighteningly close to being
over.
these kiddos have made my heart sing,
as their
REAL
momma
and for some as
the momma of their heart
it was a beautiful night.
knowing that SOMEHOW
i have to pick myself up
and
dust myself off come next month
THIS photo takes front and center on my desk as
the gentle reminder that our life here has been
very very blessed!
umarmen und lieben
(more photos to follow)
essie
Sunday, April 22, 2012
hugs love and thanks!
"little miss" has been
happily
living at home in the country
for 5 days now!
happy happy days for our family
xoxoxoxox to all
essie
happily
living at home in the country
for 5 days now!
happy happy days for our family
xoxoxoxox to all
essie
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
prayers to bring her home
in a blink
life changes...Evie made it 15 minutes from the house before an Apnea hit.
the next 20+ minutes were a blurry design of
parental fear
lights
ambulances passing on a country road to transfer
a now 7 pound miracle from one to the other
doctors and nurses in our community hospital
trying and trying to find a PIT line point
less air
and then her brave daddy started to sing
our family lullaby
Byne Bye,,,,Byne Bye,,,, stars shining
and she calmed down
45 minutes of lullaby
before she took a helicopter ride back
with a nurse who knows her like her
parents do
back.
in His infinite wisdom, G-d got her outside
for the first time today
and then
back to the hospital
i am grateful for the tender mercy
He showed our family and my beautiful
little niece tonight
and
if it's not too much to ask
make the next 10 days
easy ones for her
and the parents who are desperate to
have her home
please.
life changes...Evie made it 15 minutes from the house before an Apnea hit.
the next 20+ minutes were a blurry design of
parental fear
lights
ambulances passing on a country road to transfer
a now 7 pound miracle from one to the other
doctors and nurses in our community hospital
trying and trying to find a PIT line point
less air
and then her brave daddy started to sing
our family lullaby
Byne Bye,,,,Byne Bye,,,, stars shining
and she calmed down
45 minutes of lullaby
before she took a helicopter ride back
with a nurse who knows her like her
parents do
back.
in His infinite wisdom, G-d got her outside
for the first time today
and then
back to the hospital
i am grateful for the tender mercy
He showed our family and my beautiful
little niece tonight
and
if it's not too much to ask
make the next 10 days
easy ones for her
and the parents who are desperate to
have her home
please.
william shakespeare...gotta hand it to you!
"...and though she be but little, she is fierce."
welcome home, with all our love, sweet darling niece
Evie Bee aka "Lucky Bee"
YAYAYAYAYAYYAYYYYYYY!!!!
welcome home, with all our love, sweet darling niece
Evie Bee aka "Lucky Bee"
YAYAYAYAYAYYAYYYYYYY!!!!
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
april showers bring may flowers...right?
everyone reading knows that birthdays are among my favorite things
birthdays for OTHER people that is-
my birthday
usually hits smack dab in the middle of some natural disaster OR standardized testing week.
not the best name, Esther, for a close to Easter baby...
that was 3rd grade and the year the all the boys in my class
(a few girls too)
renamed me "Easter Egg Esther"
lovely
this birthday hasn't begun any differently...waaay too much drama
when all i really wanted was
one day
reading magazines in the sun
giving kids money to spend on overpriced food
maybe
just maybe
a little sunburnt by the time to go home.
instead
I'm a slave to my computer...
rewriting a decade old handbook
"good times" she yells from the stands
i can always hope for next year, right?
birthdays for OTHER people that is-
my birthday
usually hits smack dab in the middle of some natural disaster OR standardized testing week.
not the best name, Esther, for a close to Easter baby...
that was 3rd grade and the year the all the boys in my class
(a few girls too)
renamed me "Easter Egg Esther"
lovely
this birthday hasn't begun any differently...waaay too much drama
when all i really wanted was
one day
reading magazines in the sun
giving kids money to spend on overpriced food
maybe
just maybe
a little sunburnt by the time to go home.
instead
I'm a slave to my computer...
rewriting a decade old handbook
"good times" she yells from the stands
i can always hope for next year, right?
Saturday, April 07, 2012
6 more and then the dogs are the winners
last year, the hunt for the money egg lasted over 5 hours.
OBurtonH was wrecked searching our tiny apartment with Biggers, Wee, and BenBen
no egg here
no egg there
until finally
Biggers found the egg
well after OBurtonH went home
it was a very funny morning
this year we weren't let down
although Biggers, understanding that a message HAD to be part of the Easter Bunny's plan,
took his searching prowess to a higher level.
(see he IS college material!!)
motivated
he kept looking until
22 minutes into Easter Morning
the money egg was his.
"BS" says BenBen...and...with that the announcement
"I can't wait till next year when you aren't here!"
even Biggers had to laugh
Wee...she sat and watched, as the hunt for Gold hasn't been her lucky point
and
seeing her brothers
competing
(climbing over furniture, washing dishes to check the dishwasher, feeding the dogs to check the dog food...you can picture this now, can't you?!!)
is more than enough money egg for her
next year...Biggers will be in the states
teaching his cousin
Lucky Bee
how to find the dough...
boy am I hoping that my brother and his wife have their $$ saved!
Good Pesach and Happy Easter to everyone we love-
the sun is rising on a beautiful day!
umarmen und lieben,
essie
OBurtonH was wrecked searching our tiny apartment with Biggers, Wee, and BenBen
no egg here
no egg there
until finally
Biggers found the egg
well after OBurtonH went home
it was a very funny morning
this year we weren't let down
although Biggers, understanding that a message HAD to be part of the Easter Bunny's plan,
took his searching prowess to a higher level.
(see he IS college material!!)
motivated
he kept looking until
22 minutes into Easter Morning
the money egg was his.
"BS" says BenBen...and...with that the announcement
"I can't wait till next year when you aren't here!"
even Biggers had to laugh
Wee...she sat and watched, as the hunt for Gold hasn't been her lucky point
and
seeing her brothers
competing
(climbing over furniture, washing dishes to check the dishwasher, feeding the dogs to check the dog food...you can picture this now, can't you?!!)
is more than enough money egg for her
next year...Biggers will be in the states
teaching his cousin
Lucky Bee
how to find the dough...
boy am I hoping that my brother and his wife have their $$ saved!
Good Pesach and Happy Easter to everyone we love-
the sun is rising on a beautiful day!
umarmen und lieben,
essie
Sunday, April 01, 2012
what is it?
April Fools Day naturally!
so.
outdoor soccer season is in full force
so are tree allergies
and
bad attitudes
what is it about thinking that something is YOURS if you haven't
EARNED
it?
puzzles me...
competition aside, when I was in high school
(a zillion years ago, i realize)
we-student athletes-knew what the requirements were for participating
you had to make a 2.5 GPA
period
we didn't get
"a day off to make sure we had grades" prior to playing that weekend
we had the grades
simple concept...
what are we doing for our kiddos
by
doing everything for them?
i wonder...what is it?
essie
so.
outdoor soccer season is in full force
so are tree allergies
and
bad attitudes
what is it about thinking that something is YOURS if you haven't
EARNED
it?
puzzles me...
competition aside, when I was in high school
(a zillion years ago, i realize)
we-student athletes-knew what the requirements were for participating
you had to make a 2.5 GPA
period
we didn't get
"a day off to make sure we had grades" prior to playing that weekend
we had the grades
simple concept...
what are we doing for our kiddos
by
doing everything for them?
i wonder...what is it?
essie
Saturday, March 03, 2012
the weight of a heart
there isn't a way to measure the weight of another person's heart
particularly when you know
just how close
their heart is to breaking
so we stop
we hold the hands of the people
we love
and
we carry their hearts
to help lighten their
load
life is hard sometimes
and bearing that unexpected and unforeseen
weight
isn't easy-isn't fun-isn't what we thought we'd ever have to
do
but
because we
love
we carry the heart
gabby...
*e*...
we can't bring Alex back
but we can always remember when she was able to
be.
and then we come together and carry one another
our hearts
in-out-never alone
together.
i love you both more than words can say-
you are amazingly good people
something that carries my heart-everyday.
xoxoxoxooxoxo
essie
particularly when you know
just how close
their heart is to breaking
so we stop
we hold the hands of the people
we love
and
we carry their hearts
to help lighten their
load
life is hard sometimes
and bearing that unexpected and unforeseen
weight
isn't easy-isn't fun-isn't what we thought we'd ever have to
do
but
because we
love
we carry the heart
gabby...
*e*...
we can't bring Alex back
but we can always remember when she was able to
be.
and then we come together and carry one another
our hearts
in-out-never alone
together.
i love you both more than words can say-
you are amazingly good people
something that carries my heart-everyday.
xoxoxoxooxoxo
essie
Saturday, February 25, 2012
bumble bee buzzing all around
three months old on monday
a miracle
this little light
she has been the saving grace for us all
a miracle
november 27
one pound eight ounces
february 27
four pounds eight ounces
OUR miracle
umarmen und lieben
aunt essie
Sunday, February 12, 2012
love, family, valentines, and all things bloggish
it's my parents 46th anniversary tomorrow!
FORTY SIX YEARS
amazing...
years 31 to 46 have been
without question
heavy on the drama side but
they've made it and
our family has made it
we're all still here!
in fact, we're here with all kinds of new love
to show for the past 15 years
let's take a quick look back
the weeness arrived in 1999
a border crossing move in 2006
followed shortly thereafter by...
an international move in 2007
Lor arrived in 2009
there was a wedding in 2010
a retirement in 2011 capped by
the arrival of baby bumblebee in 2011
biggers will graduate in 2012
he will move this summer...
wee turns 16 years old
we will move this summer...
the weeness will cap our year out when he turns 13
bring on 2013
all this and more in 15 years...
and my daddy, still here
and my mommy, still here
although there were many who doubted it-
last year
forty six years ago
folks held their breath
but here we are-
loving, laughing, finding sunshine behind the clouds
looking FORWARD
the day before Valentines Day
my parents pledged their love to one another
eternal valentines setting the bar
really really high
for the rest
every life that is shared so intimately has downs that hit alongside with the ups
they aren't perfect
but
they do have an amazing legacy to enjoy and move forward with
that they do.
happy anniversary to two of my lifetime favorite valentines
and
to the rest of my family,
valentine love comes flying long distance to each of
you!
SWAK
umarmen und lieben
essie
FORTY SIX YEARS
amazing...
years 31 to 46 have been
without question
heavy on the drama side but
they've made it and
our family has made it
we're all still here!
in fact, we're here with all kinds of new love
to show for the past 15 years
let's take a quick look back
the weeness arrived in 1999
a border crossing move in 2006
followed shortly thereafter by...
an international move in 2007
Lor arrived in 2009
there was a wedding in 2010
a retirement in 2011 capped by
the arrival of baby bumblebee in 2011
biggers will graduate in 2012
he will move this summer...
wee turns 16 years old
we will move this summer...
the weeness will cap our year out when he turns 13
bring on 2013
all this and more in 15 years...
and my daddy, still here
and my mommy, still here
although there were many who doubted it-
last year
forty six years ago
folks held their breath
but here we are-
loving, laughing, finding sunshine behind the clouds
looking FORWARD
the day before Valentines Day
my parents pledged their love to one another
eternal valentines setting the bar
really really high
for the rest
every life that is shared so intimately has downs that hit alongside with the ups
they aren't perfect
but
they do have an amazing legacy to enjoy and move forward with
that they do.
happy anniversary to two of my lifetime favorite valentines
and
to the rest of my family,
valentine love comes flying long distance to each of
you!
SWAK
umarmen und lieben
essie
Sunday, January 29, 2012
and where exactly has january gone?
could someone please tell me-
i thought i knew
i guess i don't...all these days are just rolling into time
racing past my heart and head
waaaay too fast
biggers returned from Model UN yesterday
MORNING
and turns right around to fly back to the states
TOMORROW
for college visits
seriously...i'm in desperate need of "do-over" years
not do-over moments, but actual
years.
pity party over now!
this week was something.
if you get a chance, google
Barbara Coloroso
she's uh-maze-zing.
my school signed the first "anti-bullying" policy between agency and the army after the pilot program in another garrison was completed
Barbara Coloroso had a LOT to do with this, Barbara and the momma friend of mine who has done fabulous things for the agency in her job.
it's a lofty goal to eliminate bullying from a school, but, to eliminate bullying from a
community
it takes commitment, courage, and cahones!
it really does take a village...
google Barbara and you'll see where we are headed-
21st century learning never looked so inspired.
umarmen und lieben
essie
i thought i knew
i guess i don't...all these days are just rolling into time
racing past my heart and head
waaaay too fast
biggers returned from Model UN yesterday
MORNING
and turns right around to fly back to the states
TOMORROW
for college visits
seriously...i'm in desperate need of "do-over" years
not do-over moments, but actual
years.
pity party over now!
this week was something.
if you get a chance, google
Barbara Coloroso
she's uh-maze-zing.
my school signed the first "anti-bullying" policy between agency and the army after the pilot program in another garrison was completed
Barbara Coloroso had a LOT to do with this, Barbara and the momma friend of mine who has done fabulous things for the agency in her job.
it's a lofty goal to eliminate bullying from a school, but, to eliminate bullying from a
community
it takes commitment, courage, and cahones!
it really does take a village...
google Barbara and you'll see where we are headed-
21st century learning never looked so inspired.
umarmen und lieben
essie
Saturday, January 21, 2012
here we are
back again after a rapid fire work week
wow.
was i ever busy...
today it is cold and icky in germany
bleech.
yesterday: a very long and incredibly productive meeting and doodle bug got a fabbo haircut/dye
today: Model UN trip madness before prestie leaves for the Hague and Harry's 50th birthday
tomorrow: laundry, raking, mopping, cooking and driving
dontcha wish my life was yours?!!
here we are...domesticity and mid life living...at it's finest.
umarmen und lieben
essie
wow.
was i ever busy...
today it is cold and icky in germany
bleech.
yesterday: a very long and incredibly productive meeting and doodle bug got a fabbo haircut/dye
today: Model UN trip madness before prestie leaves for the Hague and Harry's 50th birthday
tomorrow: laundry, raking, mopping, cooking and driving
dontcha wish my life was yours?!!
here we are...domesticity and mid life living...at it's finest.
umarmen und lieben
essie
Saturday, January 14, 2012
home again home again jiggety jig!
long drive home in the very strange snow...snow-ish...wind...wind-ish.
home with a box full of love AND cookies
from florida
clothes-ies from colorado
and random items
from amazon
today on the menu at casa h
the taking down of a beautiful and very short lived
christmas tree
our only tree in morlenbach
the only time we will know the holidays in
this house
down
down
down.
so far, what took hours to find,
put up,
light,
and decorate
has taken a remarkable
93 minutes
to dismantle.
i have a table covered in
ornaments
and three pieces of
christmas tree
waiting on the couch to go into the
10 month box
before they are
ALL
pulled out again for the holidays in
wherever we are about to land...
next
there is something very exciting about
the unknown
the insane anticipation that brought us here
to the Odenwald
has tempered ever so slightly
because in great part
i know
100%
that we can do this...live in another country
miss who and what we love
skype or facetime
translate between no less than three languages on a daily basis
pay bills online...almost with regularity :o)
check the mail
buy groceries us or euro style
walk our dogs
we can live here and we can do it without
"holy hot mess batman" freak outs that were a little too regular this past fall
sometimes we're more spontaneous than other times
sometimes there's more available euro than other times
sometimes what's important ends up being not so much
and in all these times we've learned
we can roll with it
we can deal with it
or
we can simply let it go.
not in anyway
the end of the world
jiggety jig!
umarmen und lieben
essie
home with a box full of love AND cookies
from florida
clothes-ies from colorado
and random items
from amazon
today on the menu at casa h
the taking down of a beautiful and very short lived
christmas tree
our only tree in morlenbach
the only time we will know the holidays in
this house
down
down
down.
so far, what took hours to find,
put up,
light,
and decorate
has taken a remarkable
93 minutes
to dismantle.
i have a table covered in
ornaments
and three pieces of
christmas tree
waiting on the couch to go into the
10 month box
before they are
ALL
pulled out again for the holidays in
wherever we are about to land...
next
there is something very exciting about
the unknown
the insane anticipation that brought us here
to the Odenwald
has tempered ever so slightly
because in great part
i know
100%
that we can do this...live in another country
miss who and what we love
skype or facetime
translate between no less than three languages on a daily basis
pay bills online...almost with regularity :o)
check the mail
buy groceries us or euro style
walk our dogs
we can live here and we can do it without
"holy hot mess batman" freak outs that were a little too regular this past fall
sometimes we're more spontaneous than other times
sometimes there's more available euro than other times
sometimes what's important ends up being not so much
and in all these times we've learned
we can roll with it
we can deal with it
or
we can simply let it go.
not in anyway
the end of the world
jiggety jig!
umarmen und lieben
essie
Monday, January 09, 2012
doing
i can't say
"done and done"
YET
but today
the first of many many teacher boxes went
into the lounge with a happy sign that said
"FREE to a NEW home"
and, not looking back, taking no prisoners...
it felt really good!
books, lesson plans, activities, learning centers
all of it
sitting in the lounge waiting for new homes
a fresh start
for years of happy teaching
that until this afternoon
had been languishing in the basement
next week: five more boxes
and me, one week closer to a finish line that is really
my beginning
umarmen und lieben
essie
"done and done"
YET
but today
the first of many many teacher boxes went
into the lounge with a happy sign that said
"FREE to a NEW home"
and, not looking back, taking no prisoners...
it felt really good!
books, lesson plans, activities, learning centers
all of it
sitting in the lounge waiting for new homes
a fresh start
for years of happy teaching
that until this afternoon
had been languishing in the basement
next week: five more boxes
and me, one week closer to a finish line that is really
my beginning
umarmen und lieben
essie
Sunday, January 08, 2012
the fine line
hmmm...
what IS the fine line?
WHERE is the fine line?
how have i been missing it for so very long?!
we are safely INto 2012
next week i will have been commuting from
home
to
hohenfels
for twelve complete weeks.
which i can hardly believe
because as i explained to doodlebug
i keep myself as busy at work as i possibly can
to stop from missing
home
so very much
12 weeks have passed and
we're still dealing with boxes from
august
boxes actually from
august 2007
when we first arrived in germany
and so
with the fine line closing in on ME
and in my honest attempt to be
a true role model
this weekend i do the unthinkable...
teacher boxes
full
of the greatest, longest, hardest, most earnest
days of my life
are coming back to hohenfels with me
up
for
grabs.
it's time for me to start accepting the fine line is maybe more
of a finish line
and i have to start somewhere
or we will have august boxes from 2012
in the basement in 2017
and that folks is really where i
must
draw the line.
umarmen und lieben
essie
what IS the fine line?
WHERE is the fine line?
how have i been missing it for so very long?!
we are safely INto 2012
next week i will have been commuting from
home
to
hohenfels
for twelve complete weeks.
which i can hardly believe
because as i explained to doodlebug
i keep myself as busy at work as i possibly can
to stop from missing
home
so very much
12 weeks have passed and
we're still dealing with boxes from
august
boxes actually from
august 2007
when we first arrived in germany
and so
with the fine line closing in on ME
and in my honest attempt to be
a true role model
this weekend i do the unthinkable...
teacher boxes
full
of the greatest, longest, hardest, most earnest
days of my life
are coming back to hohenfels with me
up
for
grabs.
it's time for me to start accepting the fine line is maybe more
of a finish line
and i have to start somewhere
or we will have august boxes from 2012
in the basement in 2017
and that folks is really where i
must
draw the line.
umarmen und lieben
essie
Wednesday, January 04, 2012
trying trying!
internet is hard to come by when i'm not at casa h...
my teeny tiny little boarding house room-not exactly the plaza when it comes to modern amenities.
it IS a safe, warm place though, when it's time to sleep after a long day at school.
i'm grateful.
that role model wish for 2012
i'm trying
really i am
sitting here in the java
watching all the high schoolers come and go-
next year will be good for the 2 harrisons who move here
with
lots of room for the harrison getting ready to
spread his wings
and our extra harrison-for the boys to come back to-
next year will be good.
for now though, we're trying
to finish the quarter
to learn new routines
to prepare for indoor soccer
to study for AP exams
to move forward
it's all we can do
role model with a smile
umarmen und lieben
essie
my teeny tiny little boarding house room-not exactly the plaza when it comes to modern amenities.
it IS a safe, warm place though, when it's time to sleep after a long day at school.
i'm grateful.
that role model wish for 2012
i'm trying
really i am
sitting here in the java
watching all the high schoolers come and go-
next year will be good for the 2 harrisons who move here
with
lots of room for the harrison getting ready to
spread his wings
and our extra harrison-for the boys to come back to-
next year will be good.
for now though, we're trying
to finish the quarter
to learn new routines
to prepare for indoor soccer
to study for AP exams
to move forward
it's all we can do
role model with a smile
umarmen und lieben
essie
Monday, January 02, 2012
auld lang syne really means...
this year on NYE we actually had all 5 in the car for enough time
to
share our resolve
and get into what we thought 2012 would help us accomplish...
(not in any order they follow)
good grades
acceptance into the college of my heart
learn german-not just liquid courage german-really speaking
improve my vocabulary
be a better role model
pretty lofty for casa h!
however everyone had something to say and given that for the past few years there have been
lists
suggestions
attitudes
heartbreak
disaster
joy
unexpected surprise
the absence of silence when we went around the car, i took as, a good sign
it's funny to me how the change from one year to the next can provide
comfort and expectation
all at once
newness must do that-
re-charge our inner battery just enough for hope to float to the surface
come January 1st.
shaking bad habits
dusting yourself off when you're down
coming back for more-day in...day out
commitment = the work of life
without hope stashed somewhere in the mix all you have is pressure
like i said before...no more balls in the air this year no more pressure
2012: you're heeeere, and in my head and in my heart, hope floats
time to get started on that role model stuff.
umarmen und lieben
essie
(not in any order they follow)
good grades
acceptance into the college of my heart
learn german-not just liquid courage german-really speaking
improve my vocabulary
be a better role model
pretty lofty for casa h!
however everyone had something to say and given that for the past few years there have been
lists
suggestions
attitudes
heartbreak
disaster
joy
unexpected surprise
the absence of silence when we went around the car, i took as, a good sign
it's funny to me how the change from one year to the next can provide
comfort and expectation
all at once
newness must do that-
re-charge our inner battery just enough for hope to float to the surface
come January 1st.
shaking bad habits
dusting yourself off when you're down
coming back for more-day in...day out
commitment = the work of life
without hope stashed somewhere in the mix all you have is pressure
like i said before...no more balls in the air this year no more pressure
2012: you're heeeere, and in my head and in my heart, hope floats
time to get started on that role model stuff.
umarmen und lieben
essie
Sunday, January 01, 2012
let the new year begin
2011 was without question the year of greatest upset and upheaval that i can remember
it's been a very long time coming-waiting for 2012
waiting for the ball to drop
waiting
in 2011 our family spent too much time with balls up in the air-
that kind of pressure, no one needs to live with
in 2012 our family has already many great things to look forward to
moments that will become memories
moments where laughing is the norm
moments where tears come from joy
2012 we're ready, no more waiting.
umarmen und lieben
essie
it's been a very long time coming-waiting for 2012
waiting for the ball to drop
waiting
in 2011 our family spent too much time with balls up in the air-
that kind of pressure, no one needs to live with
in 2012 our family has already many great things to look forward to
moments that will become memories
moments where laughing is the norm
moments where tears come from joy
2012 we're ready, no more waiting.
umarmen und lieben
essie
Friday, December 23, 2011
gabby
this post is for you-
because i could
really i could leave a message on every post that your blog shares
you are such a wonderful wifey
you are such a marvelous momma
you are such a spectacular sister
you are such a fantastic friend...
i know right now you're blushing, laughing, and saying
"aaawwww essie-cakes, you are such a silly mess"
I can hear your voice in my head!
:o)
you ARE all these things, and so much more, gabness you truly are.
the memories you are working on making with your littles
the sleep you are losing because tamales and peppermint playdoh are callin
the grey along max's snout
the half smiles of your face (b/c a precious cherub has more photo space)
the look of complete satisfaction on mr. mike
you've accomplished this all
you have it good baby girl, i'm so proud of you!
G-d bless you this holiday and every day
with all my love
essie-cakes
because i could
really i could leave a message on every post that your blog shares
you are such a wonderful wifey
you are such a marvelous momma
you are such a spectacular sister
you are such a fantastic friend...
i know right now you're blushing, laughing, and saying
"aaawwww essie-cakes, you are such a silly mess"
I can hear your voice in my head!
:o)
you ARE all these things, and so much more, gabness you truly are.
the memories you are working on making with your littles
the sleep you are losing because tamales and peppermint playdoh are callin
the grey along max's snout
the half smiles of your face (b/c a precious cherub has more photo space)
the look of complete satisfaction on mr. mike
you've accomplished this all
you have it good baby girl, i'm so proud of you!
G-d bless you this holiday and every day
with all my love
essie-cakes
Saturday, December 10, 2011
eBee
on a sunday 2 weeks ago
this nugget, of nothing but pure goodness,
became the newest member of our family.
as you can see, she came too soon...
so soon, that other people would say, this might be very difficult-
but other people don't know what i know.
my niece, Evelyn Beatrice, "EvieB"
my little lovebug,
my EBee
she has the heart of a lion
and the will to live that pales in comparison
to any wonder of the world i've ever seen.
in fact-in my eyes-
she's the 8th wonder of the world-
blessing and miracle all wrapped up in 2 pounds of sugar
so tiny
yet
so big
already
at 2 weeks
her spirit fills my heart
her want to be with her family
fills my soul
i cannot wait to meet her...these are the moments when 6000 miles does make the difference
and the difference right now is hard
for now
our coffeetalks will have to suffice.
my little bumblebee...we welcome you with love!
aunt essie
Tuesday, November 01, 2011
twenty six years = nine thousand, four hundred and ninety days
in January 1986, Team Leader graduated from Ranger School...
he enlisted in october of 1985
waaay before he knew that in anchorage alaska his future was running track, dancing ballet, swimming, eating at McDonalds
his future was waiting for him, and, he had no clue.
he joined the service and made a decision to see this committment to his country
through
in the hardest way, as a Ranger, born into battalion
not looking back.
lately, he's had time to look back-
yesterday was the culmination of a twenty six year long career and a future,
he never saw coming.
today my husband,
MY center of gravity,
the man who has given me everything I never saw coming
used his Retiree ID card to access base.
talk about a moment.
yesterday when he finalized his status i apoloigized for not being THERE with him as he walked into his new life
his answer was simple:
"26 years ago I walked in quietly, by myself and today, 26 years later I'll walk out quietly...by myself"
when we hung up the phone i cried for a minute.
he's given so much, and you know today, all the people who saw the effective date on his new id card...not one person said thank you...which surprised me.
lessons learned over 26 years of service:
if YOU know why you did it, no one needs to say thank you, but it sure is nice.
lessons learned over 20 years of service:
marriage is forever.
I love you Tony-
thank you for everything you have done to secure our country in it's time of need
thank you for everything you have done to secure peace for all who desire calm and understanding
thank you for always being the person prepared
to give the ultimate sacrifice
to fight for the oppressed
to be the man our family can look up to-
congratulations, with all our love,
e,p,d, b, AND k
he enlisted in october of 1985
waaay before he knew that in anchorage alaska his future was running track, dancing ballet, swimming, eating at McDonalds
his future was waiting for him, and, he had no clue.
he joined the service and made a decision to see this committment to his country
through
in the hardest way, as a Ranger, born into battalion
not looking back.
lately, he's had time to look back-
yesterday was the culmination of a twenty six year long career and a future,
he never saw coming.
today my husband,
MY center of gravity,
the man who has given me everything I never saw coming
used his Retiree ID card to access base.
talk about a moment.
yesterday when he finalized his status i apoloigized for not being THERE with him as he walked into his new life
his answer was simple:
"26 years ago I walked in quietly, by myself and today, 26 years later I'll walk out quietly...by myself"
when we hung up the phone i cried for a minute.
he's given so much, and you know today, all the people who saw the effective date on his new id card...not one person said thank you...which surprised me.
lessons learned over 26 years of service:
if YOU know why you did it, no one needs to say thank you, but it sure is nice.
lessons learned over 20 years of service:
marriage is forever.
I love you Tony-
thank you for everything you have done to secure our country in it's time of need
thank you for everything you have done to secure peace for all who desire calm and understanding
thank you for always being the person prepared
to give the ultimate sacrifice
to fight for the oppressed
to be the man our family can look up to-
congratulations, with all our love,
e,p,d, b, AND k
Wednesday, October 05, 2011
EIGHTEEN?!?!?!?!!!!
once in a lifetime someone you love turns
18.
today it was biggers...
my number 1
the child who made me a mommy
rocked every single second of my world for
9 months
and arrived with a smile that melted my heart
and set the bar
high
high
high
he turned eighteen
snap!
just like that
we had cupcakes at football practice
the way we did on birthdays
7,8,9,10, and 11
we went to a sushi house for dinner
just like we did on birthdays
7,8,9,10, and 11
years that daddy was gone thanks to the army
and we did everything we could to make the absence seem normal-
it was the first time Team Leader had ever been at football practice to sing happy birthday to his own son.
my mother in law, on the phone tonight, said
"i know these days are bittersweet for you-i can feel that.."
bittersweet
emotional
busy
moving faster than any of us care to say
watching TL lead the team in the birthday song, i felt the first snap of an apron string breaking
my baby boy
my bigger
doodlebug and wee's big brother
OUR son
is eighteen
today
my birthday wish-that every year from here on out he feels the love that celebrated with him:
singing, laughing, joking, cupcake eating
loving him and wishing him well as he walked into his adulthood
october 5 1993
with all my love to you PAH
xoxoxoxoxoxox
momma
18.
today it was biggers...
my number 1
the child who made me a mommy
rocked every single second of my world for
9 months
and arrived with a smile that melted my heart
and set the bar
high
high
high
he turned eighteen
snap!
just like that
we had cupcakes at football practice
the way we did on birthdays
7,8,9,10, and 11
we went to a sushi house for dinner
just like we did on birthdays
7,8,9,10, and 11
years that daddy was gone thanks to the army
and we did everything we could to make the absence seem normal-
it was the first time Team Leader had ever been at football practice to sing happy birthday to his own son.
my mother in law, on the phone tonight, said
"i know these days are bittersweet for you-i can feel that.."
bittersweet
emotional
busy
moving faster than any of us care to say
watching TL lead the team in the birthday song, i felt the first snap of an apron string breaking
my baby boy
my bigger
doodlebug and wee's big brother
OUR son
is eighteen
today
my birthday wish-that every year from here on out he feels the love that celebrated with him:
singing, laughing, joking, cupcake eating
loving him and wishing him well as he walked into his adulthood
october 5 1993
with all my love to you PAH
xoxoxoxoxoxox
momma
Saturday, September 10, 2011
the start of a new decade
ten years later.
we've been at war now for ten years-
in my lifetime i never thought something like this would happen.
i remember my friends in high school as we all turned 18 talking about
the selective service registration
they would have to fill out...
one small rite of passage that to them, at the time, was insignificant.
our son turns 18 in three weeks.
for me this birthday is poignantly significant on many many levels...
and
the day he signs that same small piece of paper
i'll be one degree closer to what entering a new decade of war actually
means.
sidebar into how this 10 year day is memorialized and trivialized all at once:
with
births
deaths
celebrations
picnics
pundits
sporting events
soccer clinics
prayer
quiet reflection
more prayer
and hope-
that perhaps, ten years is enough, and that the idea of walking blindly into ten more
should
mean something
sidebar back to my dear college friend in Japan-
i think of your brother, his selfless bravery in the face of true evil, and you...
part of a loving and gentle family that gave him the strength to be that man in that moment-i am in awe
i remain grateful and hopeful everyday because of it
you both signed that small piece of paper once upon a time...
segway into the reminder that in this world there are no guarantees
BUT
that doesn't mean we have to live in fear-
the unknown isn't always a terrible thing.
we should though, posture ourselves to live the lives we have graciously been given
with laughter, joy, and hope.
everyday
even when we aren't sure we really want to...
we have these days to live because someone else has signed that small piece of paper
and
has in someway or another
been called to answer for it
everyday-find the moment
live it
love someone because of it
laugh for no reason
pray for peace-everyday
Rest in Peace Jeremy and Karen
with love
e
we've been at war now for ten years-
in my lifetime i never thought something like this would happen.
i remember my friends in high school as we all turned 18 talking about
the selective service registration
they would have to fill out...
one small rite of passage that to them, at the time, was insignificant.
our son turns 18 in three weeks.
for me this birthday is poignantly significant on many many levels...
and
the day he signs that same small piece of paper
i'll be one degree closer to what entering a new decade of war actually
means.
sidebar into how this 10 year day is memorialized and trivialized all at once:
with
births
deaths
celebrations
picnics
pundits
sporting events
soccer clinics
prayer
quiet reflection
more prayer
and hope-
that perhaps, ten years is enough, and that the idea of walking blindly into ten more
should
mean something
sidebar back to my dear college friend in Japan-
i think of your brother, his selfless bravery in the face of true evil, and you...
part of a loving and gentle family that gave him the strength to be that man in that moment-i am in awe
i remain grateful and hopeful everyday because of it
you both signed that small piece of paper once upon a time...
segway into the reminder that in this world there are no guarantees
BUT
that doesn't mean we have to live in fear-
the unknown isn't always a terrible thing.
we should though, posture ourselves to live the lives we have graciously been given
with laughter, joy, and hope.
everyday
even when we aren't sure we really want to...
we have these days to live because someone else has signed that small piece of paper
and
has in someway or another
been called to answer for it
everyday-find the moment
live it
love someone because of it
laugh for no reason
pray for peace-everyday
Rest in Peace Jeremy and Karen
with love
e
Monday, August 22, 2011
sweet little blog o mine
i haven't forgotten you
I SWEAR!
it's been a busy busy summer-
moving
soccer
moving
cars
dogs
kids
family
summer
and it ends tonight
*sigh*
Year 22 begins
umarmen und lieben
essie
I SWEAR!
it's been a busy busy summer-
moving
soccer
moving
cars
dogs
kids
family
summer
and it ends tonight
*sigh*
Year 22 begins
umarmen und lieben
essie
Sunday, July 17, 2011
photo-palooza begins now!
TDY love, take one: March 2011
Poland with Lena and babies: February 2011
(the magical glass garden...next trip, the peacock comes home)
(all the loot from that trip and yes-the christmas tree is in the background)
Michael Brendel ODP tourney...the faces of soccer that i love...
(benzilla totally torked off b/c his team came in 3rd...)
Momma: denim and diamond auction Feb.2011
(that's the bavarian bed i won for $82.00-madness!!!)
Pres: indoor soccer tourney Nov. 2010
Poland with Lena and babies: February 2011
(the magical glass garden...next trip, the peacock comes home)
(all the loot from that trip and yes-the christmas tree is in the background)
Michael Brendel ODP tourney...the faces of soccer that i love...
(benzilla totally torked off b/c his team came in 3rd...)
Momma: denim and diamond auction Feb.2011
(that's the bavarian bed i won for $82.00-madness!!!)
Pres: indoor soccer tourney Nov. 2010
Sunday, June 19, 2011
good grief
i've been a baad blogger.
and i missed (among other things)
wishing my one and only
girl
the happiest 15th birthday a momma could ever wish!
as i type
i'm down(or is it UP)loading
762 photos from my camera
essentially the lives of those wacky inhabitants at casa h
since...
January-ugh-i'm in blogging time-out for bad behavior!
i'm getting there folks-hang in!
umarmen und lieben
essie
and i missed (among other things)
wishing my one and only
girl
the happiest 15th birthday a momma could ever wish!
as i type
i'm down(or is it UP)loading
762 photos from my camera
essentially the lives of those wacky inhabitants at casa h
since...
January-ugh-i'm in blogging time-out for bad behavior!
i'm getting there folks-hang in!
umarmen und lieben
essie
Wednesday, June 01, 2011
no 368 house photos
these photos aren't on fb...
side view of the front of house
backyard from the bier garten
backyard minus our 4 legged neighbors
my new kitchen! as seen from the dining room
YAYAYAYAY!!!
side view of the front of house
backyard from the bier garten
backyard minus our 4 legged neighbors
my new kitchen! as seen from the dining room
YAYAYAYAY!!!
Monday, May 30, 2011
367 odenwald...here we come!
miracle of miracles
we found out on saturday that
the house
the place where
i can see
friends
parties
family
parties
birthdays
parties
anniversaries
parties
graduations
parties
dances
parties
dresses
parties
suits
parties
flowers
parties
coffee mornings
parties
snow
parties
sunshine
parties
commuting
parties
a trampoline
parties
and puppies becoming
dogs
the house
is ours for the renting
and my heart is
happy!
now-some photos are on fb-and photos
will eventually be posted here
i owe lots of picts...i know this...i've been really busy
BUT
what most be noted for posterity-
there is MUCH room for all of our lovies to join us
in
Germany!~!~!~!
please consider it...
umarmen und lieben
essie
we found out on saturday that
the house
the place where
i can see
friends
parties
family
parties
birthdays
parties
anniversaries
parties
graduations
parties
dances
parties
dresses
parties
suits
parties
flowers
parties
coffee mornings
parties
snow
parties
sunshine
parties
commuting
parties
a trampoline
parties
and puppies becoming
dogs
the house
is ours for the renting
and my heart is
happy!
now-some photos are on fb-and photos
will eventually be posted here
i owe lots of picts...i know this...i've been really busy
BUT
what most be noted for posterity-
there is MUCH room for all of our lovies to join us
in
Germany!~!~!~!
please consider it...
umarmen und lieben
essie
Sunday, May 22, 2011
weeeel hello there friends!!
it's been so long since i blogged i realized i didn't know if i remembered my LOG IN!
errp.
with a little hair dye and head scratching
i got it
and
with high school soccer officially over for this school year
i'm back!
photos of the soccer madness will be posted, and the fyi-
we have 2 kinder receiving varsity letters...
wooo stinkin hooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
our harrisons were spectacular
in every way!
(i love my kiddos very very much)
umarmen und lieben
essie
errp.
with a little hair dye and head scratching
i got it
and
with high school soccer officially over for this school year
i'm back!
photos of the soccer madness will be posted, and the fyi-
we have 2 kinder receiving varsity letters...
wooo stinkin hooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
our harrisons were spectacular
in every way!
(i love my kiddos very very much)
umarmen und lieben
essie
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
4 out of 4
snap your fingers and
poof.
just like that
you watch your first born
register for his
last
year
of school...
bittersweet
doesn't even begin to describe
the place
where my heart sleeps tonight
so proud
and full of disbelief
all at once
where did time fly away too
and why do i want it to slow
slow
so much
slow down?
i love you with every piece of my momma heart
p.a.h.
every piece
and it is my momma heart-string wish
for you
that the year ahead is magic.
umarmen und lieben
momma
poof.
just like that
you watch your first born
register for his
last
year
of school...
bittersweet
doesn't even begin to describe
the place
where my heart sleeps tonight
so proud
and full of disbelief
all at once
where did time fly away too
and why do i want it to slow
slow
so much
slow down?
i love you with every piece of my momma heart
p.a.h.
every piece
and it is my momma heart-string wish
for you
that the year ahead is magic.
umarmen und lieben
momma
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Monday, March 14, 2011
362 wild horses
what an insane week-
BUT
what a lucky girl, getting to see gaia, grandpadad, uncle j, ang, lor, da, and...
my rahnie/schultz!!!
(as if they were a WWE tag team!!)
i met some wonderful folks at HQ
i did some wonderful work, with said folks, at HQ
i decided to fill "my house in germany that doesn't know it's our house" with beautiful paintings
starting with Grammie's, and now adding TWO more beauties of Rodger's to our fray!
"word"
"the bride"
"a sweet disorder"
meet
"esther bonsai"
"cinnamon bonsai"
and "almost tony bonsai" which is a comission based on this piece, which team leader fell in love with
but was sold faster than we could purchase
rodger is the hubby of my superfly momma rose, and daddy of my super K, and
the magician behind this amazing talent.
HE is so seriously up and coming-wild horses couldn't stop this man
WE are so proud to call him and his beautiful family our friends
great people
great art
it was a whirlwind week-part 2 starts up in less than 3 weeks
i can't wait!
umarmen und lieben
essie
BUT
what a lucky girl, getting to see gaia, grandpadad, uncle j, ang, lor, da, and...
my rahnie/schultz!!!
(as if they were a WWE tag team!!)
i met some wonderful folks at HQ
i did some wonderful work, with said folks, at HQ
i decided to fill "my house in germany that doesn't know it's our house" with beautiful paintings
starting with Grammie's, and now adding TWO more beauties of Rodger's to our fray!
"word"
"the bride"
"a sweet disorder"
meet
"esther bonsai"
"cinnamon bonsai"
and "almost tony bonsai" which is a comission based on this piece, which team leader fell in love with
but was sold faster than we could purchase
rodger is the hubby of my superfly momma rose, and daddy of my super K, and
the magician behind this amazing talent.
HE is so seriously up and coming-wild horses couldn't stop this man
WE are so proud to call him and his beautiful family our friends
great people
great art
it was a whirlwind week-part 2 starts up in less than 3 weeks
i can't wait!
umarmen und lieben
essie
Saturday, March 05, 2011
361 remember
I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free.
~Michelangelo
with love, hugs, prayers and peace
to e, and g,
with our friendship
hand in hand
heart to heart
always
~Michelangelo
with love, hugs, prayers and peace
to e, and g,
with our friendship
hand in hand
heart to heart
always
Friday, February 18, 2011
360. i can hear the angels singing
best day EVER
was yesterday
(which is still coming up as today b/c that's how my yoda laptop works...)
holy smoke-
this past week has been busy busy busy
making me
tired tired tired
all leading up to friday and a professional development day that was setting itself up to be maybe not so much fun.
the big kicker, me, and my 2 coaching partners in crime were RESPONSIBLE for the professional development
us
with big smiles
"this will be fun, and useful, and help us all work on our craft!"
looking out at
a cohort of colleagues who are dealing (or not) with the impending upheaval of a move because of base realignments.
FYI-if you don't know, having no control over your future can be a terrifying thing,
and
when you've lived somewhere for as long as 20 years
being told you have to attend a meeting to begin that process can be a
major
buzz
kill
(now over at casa h, we haven't lived ANYWHERE for more than 7 years, but the uncertainty of big moves can be troubling...)
back to the buzz kill-
I
was the presenter scheduled to do her thing when we all came back to our professional dev after the morning meeting.
the "after lunch bunch"
i was so nervous i literally took 30 seconds and cried.
(and yes, maybe it was a little overly dramatic of me, but the friend I was with is a boston toughie, she can handle it)
i went to my pro dev and pasted on my best
"not terrifed"
smile until i learned that the superintendent for curriculum instruction and assessment was there-
early-we DID have a meeting but it was meant to be AFTER my schpeel
NOT
before it.
gulp
big girl panties on now-i do my part and right brain/left brain balance my fear with how we all need to LOOK at our students as the whole child, not one way or another, brain balanced activities in the classroom, mind mapping my way through the longest and shortest hour of my life.
woohoo at 2:00!
i'm done!
then the meeting-with our superintendent CIA
heh
it even makes him laugh
a BIG very important meeting that sends me in 10 days back to the states to HeadQuarters
OMG
OMG
OMG
twice
that's right TWO trips back to virginia and my MOMMY!!!!
(sidebar: gaia is having amazing reactions to her chemo meds, the infusion nurses are thrilled, she has all her hair-tho prestie shaved his off in solidarity to his grandma-heart of MY heart)
so i wrap up my meeting, and come home.
friday was almost over-BUT
somewhere in an office-somewhere
my district superintendent was working with our HR and union to decide who (of the 79folks that were looking for jobs-all those people with me in the morning meeting) would get one of the 65 available jobs in our district and maybe not have to make a tremendous move somewhere around the world.
at 6;16 pm my notification came to my work inbox
i was placed in THE school where i wanted to go-
with an admin team i cannot wait to work for-
in a city in germany that will allow
pres to graduate here
dollie to graduate here
and
ben (who was REALLY rooting for italy)
to be pretty ticked off but available enough to be bribed back into happy.
no more worrying about job security
no more stairwell
benefits that give us a real life with ROOTS
my heart overflows with thanks for the blessing bestowed on my family-
roots.
a fighting momma.
a job.
and with that, i CAN hear the angels singing!
it is a full on hallelujah chorus!!!!
wiesbaden germany-get ready for casa h!
umarmen und lieben
essie
was yesterday
(which is still coming up as today b/c that's how my yoda laptop works...)
holy smoke-
this past week has been busy busy busy
making me
tired tired tired
all leading up to friday and a professional development day that was setting itself up to be maybe not so much fun.
the big kicker, me, and my 2 coaching partners in crime were RESPONSIBLE for the professional development
us
with big smiles
"this will be fun, and useful, and help us all work on our craft!"
looking out at
a cohort of colleagues who are dealing (or not) with the impending upheaval of a move because of base realignments.
FYI-if you don't know, having no control over your future can be a terrifying thing,
and
when you've lived somewhere for as long as 20 years
being told you have to attend a meeting to begin that process can be a
major
buzz
kill
(now over at casa h, we haven't lived ANYWHERE for more than 7 years, but the uncertainty of big moves can be troubling...)
back to the buzz kill-
I
was the presenter scheduled to do her thing when we all came back to our professional dev after the morning meeting.
the "after lunch bunch"
i was so nervous i literally took 30 seconds and cried.
(and yes, maybe it was a little overly dramatic of me, but the friend I was with is a boston toughie, she can handle it)
i went to my pro dev and pasted on my best
"not terrifed"
smile until i learned that the superintendent for curriculum instruction and assessment was there-
early-we DID have a meeting but it was meant to be AFTER my schpeel
NOT
before it.
gulp
big girl panties on now-i do my part and right brain/left brain balance my fear with how we all need to LOOK at our students as the whole child, not one way or another, brain balanced activities in the classroom, mind mapping my way through the longest and shortest hour of my life.
woohoo at 2:00!
i'm done!
then the meeting-with our superintendent CIA
heh
it even makes him laugh
a BIG very important meeting that sends me in 10 days back to the states to HeadQuarters
OMG
OMG
OMG
twice
that's right TWO trips back to virginia and my MOMMY!!!!
(sidebar: gaia is having amazing reactions to her chemo meds, the infusion nurses are thrilled, she has all her hair-tho prestie shaved his off in solidarity to his grandma-heart of MY heart)
so i wrap up my meeting, and come home.
friday was almost over-BUT
somewhere in an office-somewhere
my district superintendent was working with our HR and union to decide who (of the 79folks that were looking for jobs-all those people with me in the morning meeting) would get one of the 65 available jobs in our district and maybe not have to make a tremendous move somewhere around the world.
at 6;16 pm my notification came to my work inbox
i was placed in THE school where i wanted to go-
with an admin team i cannot wait to work for-
in a city in germany that will allow
pres to graduate here
dollie to graduate here
and
ben (who was REALLY rooting for italy)
to be pretty ticked off but available enough to be bribed back into happy.
no more worrying about job security
no more stairwell
benefits that give us a real life with ROOTS
my heart overflows with thanks for the blessing bestowed on my family-
roots.
a fighting momma.
a job.
and with that, i CAN hear the angels singing!
it is a full on hallelujah chorus!!!!
wiesbaden germany-get ready for casa h!
umarmen und lieben
essie
Saturday, February 05, 2011
Tuesday, February 01, 2011
no 358 just like that
it is february!
and this baby (photo taken in december)
will be FOUR months old on the 9th!!
and this baby (photo taken in december)
will be FOUR months old on the 9th!!
photo montage to follow!
umarmen und lieben
e
Sunday, January 30, 2011
no 357 who else is going to bring you a broken arrow
so i've spent the morning trolling blogs written by women who are fully funded (by hubbies that must be gazillionaires and all the ads on their sites) who are 100% into the home decor thing.
now, don't get me wrong, i'm all about a pretty home
i guess i don't keep up with trends, and really decorate with things i like or were given to me by people i love(d)
as the only girl, i've gotten a lot of the pass downs from the grammies and grandpas, and every now and then i'm reminded of just how old some of these things are...like this chair i'm sitting in-right now
it was in my grandfather's office in DC, and i've loved it since i was in middle school
loved it so much that my mom had it recovered for me 8 or so years ago
-
because really
i'm not the girl who has figured out how to do that
-
but in this last month, a leg has broken, and i think my days with this sweet old friend might be really numbered...does giving it away mean i'm a bad granddaughter?
should i find someone who can help me restore it to greatness...a little more life yet to be lived, or sat in, really
and this computer desk...bedroom furniture that mom and dad got for pres back
in
2000...
it's a full on hot mess
BUT
since we moved here the kids friends have written on it, signed their names, left their marks and personalized it in a way that monograms just couldn't do it justice.
it is bulky
it is outdated
it is ours...but should IT go?
speaking of which, my cookbook madness...i love a good cookbook, and when we left nc, i gave at least 20+ away
so explain this
(for the record...these are the books actually on a shelf.
the rest are stacked on a counter...all 15 of them, and, one recipe box)
how do you decide when you're ready to make changes...is there a cosmo quiz out there somewhere to help you know WHEN?
i happen to love my christmas tree
and all our ornaments
and my colored lights
i really don't want a theme tree every year...it's hard enough for me to commit to gift wrap!
anyhoo...oma mentioned that mr. pres has photos on fb that made her feel like she was on a virtual field trip with the boy...and made me realize that i've been pretty bad about sharing life in europe with ya'll.
must be the opsec in me
(operational security for those who just said "what the face, essie?!!")
i really don't like taking photos of our base, or the bases we go to-just in case.
but i can take photos of where we go and what we do when we are OFF post
and i can work a little more on the sharing part
while i'm throwing away and repainting everything we own in between!
gaia, btw, sounds fantastic and is swimming a mile a day in spite of her monthly trip to the doctor!
grandpadad is walking a full country mile a day, up and down winding roads with more energy now than he knew he still had!
oreo is the happiest little doggie, thanks in great part, to all the new outfits he's gotten post life-redeux!
junior has FINALLY figured out how to go DOWNSTAIRS without being carried-miracle of miracles-and in the nick of time as he's topped 30 pounds at 16 weeks!
the kinder of casa h are recovering from a nasty bout of make-up work-
team leader is perfecting his future stay at home princess cooking
(which i love...who else is going to bring me a bottle of rain...just him)
and me
i've taken a very refreshing break from fb, a self induced cyber holiday, proving to myself that i really prefer blogging to all the insane fb updating that i did before
i've cleaned my head and heart of the worry, stress, and negativity that started up my school year and i'm not looking back!
(in fact, i'm even listening to music in the house, another thing off my 2011 to do list...go me!)
we're survivors over here at casa h, us, folks and furniture-
thinking i've answered my own question i'm off to look for some fabric and wood glue.
happy almost february to all my loves
umarmen und lieben
essie
now, don't get me wrong, i'm all about a pretty home
i guess i don't keep up with trends, and really decorate with things i like or were given to me by people i love(d)
as the only girl, i've gotten a lot of the pass downs from the grammies and grandpas, and every now and then i'm reminded of just how old some of these things are...like this chair i'm sitting in-right now
it was in my grandfather's office in DC, and i've loved it since i was in middle school
loved it so much that my mom had it recovered for me 8 or so years ago
-
because really
i'm not the girl who has figured out how to do that
-
but in this last month, a leg has broken, and i think my days with this sweet old friend might be really numbered...does giving it away mean i'm a bad granddaughter?
should i find someone who can help me restore it to greatness...a little more life yet to be lived, or sat in, really
and this computer desk...bedroom furniture that mom and dad got for pres back
in
2000...
it's a full on hot mess
BUT
since we moved here the kids friends have written on it, signed their names, left their marks and personalized it in a way that monograms just couldn't do it justice.
it is bulky
it is outdated
it is ours...but should IT go?
speaking of which, my cookbook madness...i love a good cookbook, and when we left nc, i gave at least 20+ away
so explain this
(for the record...these are the books actually on a shelf.
the rest are stacked on a counter...all 15 of them, and, one recipe box)
how do you decide when you're ready to make changes...is there a cosmo quiz out there somewhere to help you know WHEN?
i happen to love my christmas tree
and all our ornaments
and my colored lights
i really don't want a theme tree every year...it's hard enough for me to commit to gift wrap!
anyhoo...oma mentioned that mr. pres has photos on fb that made her feel like she was on a virtual field trip with the boy...and made me realize that i've been pretty bad about sharing life in europe with ya'll.
must be the opsec in me
(operational security for those who just said "what the face, essie?!!")
i really don't like taking photos of our base, or the bases we go to-just in case.
but i can take photos of where we go and what we do when we are OFF post
and i can work a little more on the sharing part
while i'm throwing away and repainting everything we own in between!
gaia, btw, sounds fantastic and is swimming a mile a day in spite of her monthly trip to the doctor!
grandpadad is walking a full country mile a day, up and down winding roads with more energy now than he knew he still had!
oreo is the happiest little doggie, thanks in great part, to all the new outfits he's gotten post life-redeux!
junior has FINALLY figured out how to go DOWNSTAIRS without being carried-miracle of miracles-and in the nick of time as he's topped 30 pounds at 16 weeks!
the kinder of casa h are recovering from a nasty bout of make-up work-
team leader is perfecting his future stay at home princess cooking
(which i love...who else is going to bring me a bottle of rain...just him)
and me
i've taken a very refreshing break from fb, a self induced cyber holiday, proving to myself that i really prefer blogging to all the insane fb updating that i did before
i've cleaned my head and heart of the worry, stress, and negativity that started up my school year and i'm not looking back!
(in fact, i'm even listening to music in the house, another thing off my 2011 to do list...go me!)
we're survivors over here at casa h, us, folks and furniture-
thinking i've answered my own question i'm off to look for some fabric and wood glue.
happy almost february to all my loves
umarmen und lieben
essie
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Saturday, January 15, 2011
no.351 back
from a whirlwind trip to the states
i'm still putting it all together in my head...the moment i hugged my mom-
how little she felt in my arms
my brothers and dad
how their bodies all relaxed-slackening after carrying so much weight these past few weeks.
driving to the doctor, again and again
cleaning out drawers and shelves
(don't forget to make that salvation army drop!)
setting up schedules
learning how to
shop online for groceries (WHO KNEW!!)
resetting our family goals-
our hopes and dreams
that are so simple in actuality
but mean everything, all on the table, open and exposed
in this new year
i'm sorry i didn't get to see and/or say goodbye to the people who carry their love for our family in their hearts-you make living in a small community worth all the wealth in the world and tho we didn't get to see and say what our hearts know...
i
love
you
all!
umarmen und lieben
essie
i'm still putting it all together in my head...the moment i hugged my mom-
how little she felt in my arms
my brothers and dad
how their bodies all relaxed-slackening after carrying so much weight these past few weeks.
driving to the doctor, again and again
cleaning out drawers and shelves
(don't forget to make that salvation army drop!)
setting up schedules
learning how to
shop online for groceries (WHO KNEW!!)
resetting our family goals-
our hopes and dreams
that are so simple in actuality
but mean everything, all on the table, open and exposed
in this new year
i'm sorry i didn't get to see and/or say goodbye to the people who carry their love for our family in their hearts-you make living in a small community worth all the wealth in the world and tho we didn't get to see and say what our hearts know...
i
love
you
all!
umarmen und lieben
essie
Saturday, January 01, 2011
no. 350 Guten Rutsch
we hope your slide into 2011 was fun, fast, and gave you enough time to find something soft to catch you upon impact!
umarmen und lieben
essie
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